Guys are complicated creatures…

“I’m faced with the eternal male predicament: on one hand, my hot girlfriend is talking to me. On the other,  they’re showing the Rambo preview…”

Kevin gets romantic…

“I love you. Take your pants off.”

we’d save so much time if we could combine the two…

“It seems like all we do is kill zombies and make out.”

Alienating his demographic, one generalization at a time…

K: Walking down Yonge St. reminds me of how much I hate Jack Skellington.
A: Why?
K: He’s everywhere in the Goth shops. The Goths stole that movie from us.
A: Us?
K: Y’know, normal people.

Are these bones worth anything? They’re old…

“Antiques Roadshow makes me want to kill my parents and then cash in.”